You Remain Alone
by Sorida
Summary: Prime. Bumblebee knew the day would come when Raf grew up, but he never expected it this soon. The carefully constructed walls come crashing down after a harsh argument breaks out. When the youngest Autobot is depressed, what holds the team together?
1. Prologue

_Summary: He knew it would happen eventually, but he had been hoping that "eventually" would hold out just a little bit longer. Bumblebee and Raf are growing apart as the human ages. One afternoon, they get into a particularly nasty argument that ends with the boy alone and the bot on the run. Things don't look too good when Megatron enters the fray._

_A/N: I know, I know, I have a lot of random stuff up already that I need to update (which I will in due time), but once you get a plot bunny, they don't stop nipping at your mind until you finally give in. Well, this one's had enough time in my brain, so here's something to kick it off. Besides, Prime is in desperate need of Bee fics…I'll be uploading some other starter chapters soon and I will update my other stuff soon._

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><p>Prologue<p>

It was like preventing the inevitable. Actually, he was trying to prevent the inevitable. Bumblebee sighed, laying his helm in a servo as he waited for a call from Raf. The boy had aged two years, hardly more than a blink to the scout, and everything had changed so much.

Yes, Raf was still a computer nerd, and Bumblebee was thankful for that, but he was growing up. Raf wasn't interested in Bee's racing games anymore, opting instead for FPS games. While Bee liked some of them (a company called Valve intrigued him to no end), the one game Raf loved above all else was the one he hated most of all: Call of Duty. The scout couldn't help but shudder as he watched Raf go on "missions" within the game. Every time someone was shot, Bumblebee could only be reminded of those he lost, not to mention his memories of Megatron's torture. Absentmindedly, he felt the area around his damaged voice modulator. The thing was, he could talk, but doing so was exhausting and very painful.

Then there was Raf's homework taking away valuable time they could be spending together. Bumblebee spent more time alone than ever before and he hated every second of it. Being alone allowed all those thoughts to resurface, the guilt, the sadness, everything. He had to keep going, be "the kid" of the Autobots; he had to do everything but stop and think.

He had to keep moving or else it would all catch up to him, slamming into him like an unforgiving canon shot. Talk to Arcee, scout with Optimus Prime, play music with Bulkhead and Miko, help Jack with college stuff, fix some of Ratchet's "important" broken equipment; he was desperate for any kind of work or activity. As long as it kept his processor busy, it was fine.

But over time, Bumblebee realized that he wasn't happy anymore. Raf was fourteen now, fifteen in a little over an Earth month, and everything had changed too drastically. The boy had been the scout's constant, his security. Raf was the reason he triple checked his espionage plans on the Decepticons, his motivation to return in one piece. Now, everything slowed down and Bumblebee couldn't live with all the pent-up sadness and pain.

So when their argument broke out, it was simple inference that could predict that the walls came crashing down. Everything that was kept bottled up inside came pouring out and nobody could do anything about it. So he ran away. A spark-broken scout had strayed from the rest.

It's as simple as that.


	2. Chapter 1

Bumblebee drove into the base with Raf in the passenger seat. The boy seemed to be slightly angered and the yellow muscle car gave off an air of annoyance. As soon as he stopped, Raf climbed out and walked towards Miko and Jack, completely ignoring his guardian as he transformed.

"Hey Raf, what's up?" Miko asked. The Japanese teen hadn't changed that much, but now she wouldn't make a break for the Ground Bridge every time it activated. She'd only do it occasionally with warning ahead of time. It didn't really bother any of them, she'd learned her lesson (took her a good year too) after a close-call where she, Bulkhead, Arcee, and Bumblebee were nearly killed. Arcee and Bee managed to think of a plan while Bulkhead called for a Ground Bridge. Arcee was almost left behind, if not for the two mechs pulling her through at the last second. After that, Jack had given Miko a good piece of his mind and, from then on, she stopped the mad dashes.

"Fine," Raf answered, tone revealing a bit of frustration, "Bee was just being a bit over-protective."

**_"Those students were using you."_** Bumblebee beeped before turning his attention to the latest project Ratchet assigned him.

"Those students were my friends and you scared them away." Raf answered. He sighed, "Look, I know you have my best interests at heart and I appreciate it, I really do, but I have to draw the line somewhere. I know how to take care of myself. I'm older now, I'm growing up."

**_And that's exactly what I don't want to hear._** Bumblebee thought, flinching as he accidentally ran the welder he was using over his right servo.

"C'mon Bee, lighten up," Miko called out, "If Raf's in trouble, you'd know it. But Raf's got a point, he can take care of himself and we're still in high school with him, so no big deal." Her reassurances fell on deaf audio receptors.

"Hey Bee, maybe talking to Arcee would help." Jack offered, "She kind of went through the same thing with me."

**_"Ok...yeah, I could do that."_ **Bee beeped back. He nodded just to make sure he got the point across to the other two who couldn't translate his beeps. After seeing Jack smile back, he left the humans in search of the feisty two-wheeler.

Once Jack saw that the yellow mech was gone, he turned his attention to the youngest human on base. Raf had taken a seat next to Miko and was about to start his homework.

"Hey Raf, you think we could talk?" he asked.

"Um, sure Jack," Raf replied, walked over to him and sat down on the couch next to him, "What's up?"

"I just wanted to talk to you about Bee."

"Why?"

"Well, Arcee and I kind of went through something similar to this, remember?"

"Yeah, you two randomly decided not to talk to each other for a week."

"That's it. Anyway, that was just a few months after the whole Unicron and Optimus-lost-his-memory thing. She started getting more protective of me and I was annoyed with it. So, when nobody else was around in here (he gestured to the rec. room), we had a bit of a shouting match. She was defending her position and I was trying to get her to lay low for a bit. We both said some things we regret now and we stopped talking. I speak for both of us when I say that that was the worst week of our lives.

"There was a Decepticon attack by the week's end and, as you probably remember, Bulkhead was nearly totaled. When I saw him on that berth and Miko crying in the med-bay, I realized that it could have been Arcee and me in there. The last things we could have said to each other would have been words of hatred…ones that we never meant. All the guilt just came to me all at once and I finally apologized to Arcee. She forgave me and apologized too. We worked something out and here we are now, I'm looking at college stuff and she comes with me on the visits to help me decide on which to go to. I guess what I'm trying to get at is this: you should really talk to Bee. He is the youngest Autobot and he's going to stay the way he is for a while. Just try to get him to understand and try not to lose your cool. Seriously, you guys have a great relationship. I don't want to see the same thing that happened to Arcee and I happen to you."

"Alright, I'll keep that in mind." Raf said, staring down at the ground. In all honesty, he was a bit uncomfortable with the conversation. Sure, he understood that Bumblebee just wanted to protect him, but scaring off the friends he actually managed to make was going too far. Still, he wouldn't mind talking everything over with Bee since it would probably help them both. He pushed the thoughts away before starting his homework, musing about how much he hated English essays.

...

**_"Arcee, are you in here?"_** Bumblebee called out while knocking on the door. He stood outside Arcee's room, looking a bit nervous. The door opened, revealing the femme's surprised faceplate.

"What are you doing here Bee?" she asked. Her tone wasn't harsh, just surprised at the random appearance of the scout.

**_"Well...can we talk?"_** he asked sheepishly.

"Um, sure," Arcee replied, opening the door so Bee could enter, "What do you want to talk about?" She closed the door once Bee sat down on her berth. Normally, she would boot him (or anyone else for that matter) off of it, but the sadness and pain in his optics stopped her from doing so. Bumblebee never outwardly showed his emotions and doing so meant something was seriously wrong.

**_"Well...it's about Raf."_** Bee beeped, optics downcast, _"It seems like he doesn't want to spend time with me anymore and he acts like everything I do is childish and immature. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to restrict him too much."_

"Jack told you to talk to me, didn't he?" she asked with a small smile.

**_"Yeah, he did."_**

"Figures," she sat down next to Bee, "I don't really know what I can do to help you. This is really between you and Raf, so the two of you should talk it out. Just, find some secluded area of the base and talk. That's what Jack and I should have done, but we're both so stubborn." She smiled sadly. "As much as I wish that argument never happened, I can't help but thank Primus it did. It helped us both understand each other and set limits to the other's privacy. I don't want you going through the same pain, but Raf will want his space and you should be willing to give it. I'm sure he'll tell you if you ask."

**_"Ok, thanks Arcee."_** Bumblebee got up to leave, but was stopped when something grabbed his servo. Arcee turned him around and stared into his large optics.

"Bumblebee, you can tell me anything. You can talk to everyone on this team and we will do our best to understand. Please, talk to us. We're getting worried about you. When you came in here, I could tell there was more than Raf on your processor, so spill Bee. None of us like seeing you like this." Over the last few months, Arcee had noticed the scout's deteriorating condition. Bumblebee seemed so absorbed in work, doing anything and everything he was asked to do down to the last, and miniscule detail. He had changed drastically and it scared her and the rest of the team.

Bumblebee used to watch Saturday morning cartoons, dragging at least three others in to watch with him. Now, he occupied that time by working on one of Ratchet's projects until Decepticon activity picked up again. Arcee hated watching him work instead of relaxing and having fun. He was still a kid; he needed those child-like activities to keep his mind balanced. The war had done irreversible damage to him, physically and mentally; he needed that "kid time."

She could only watch as he grew haggard, as sadness gripped his very mind. He still acted happy and fun around everyone, but Arcee had caught him in those rare moments where he let everything sink in for a minute. The pain in his optics haunted her, as no youngling should have experienced what he had.

The grip she had on his servo tightened, afraid to let the child go off into the world again. Pit, even Ratchet was nervous about Bumblebee's well-being. Every time they got into a fight with the Decepticons, Bee always put everyone else before himself. The type of selflessness he had impressed them, until he started taking hits for them.

The damage he took during battle became more and more extensive as he pulled stupid, yet vital, stunts to ensure a victory against the Decepticons. One day, Arcee and Bulkhead had to drag him through the Ground Bridge, only moments away from off-lining. Ratchet didn't even scold the youngling after that encounter, too shocked and scared for Bumblebee's condition to do anything else but work to get his spark steady.

After that incident, Arcee rallied with Bulkhead to keep Bee on Ground Bridge duty, fearing for the youngest member's life. Optimus Prime compromised with them, only letting Bee come along for more urgent missions where an extra servo was needed. But even during those battles, Bee was the one who came back with the most damage.

For once in her life, Arcee let her optics plead to another. She looked right into Bumblebee's optics, desperate to get him to open up. He always put others before himself… and for once, it was time to give that kindness back. Arcee knew Bee kept things bottled up, kept himself going by numbing his mind to the sadness and grief, only letting happiness and innocence get through to the others. There was no possible way someone could be that care-free and happy with so much darkness inside of them. He needed to let it out before something pushed him over the edge. If that happened…Arcee didn't want to think of what would become of the scout.

_**"Arcee…not now, I don't want to talk about it."**_ Her spark sank at those words. As she let his servo go, she couldn't help but think of the scared, little sparkling Bee was inside. He was so vulnerable now; he needed help…but that help had to come from Raf. His downward spiral had started when he and Raf began growing apart. Raf was his constant, taking Optimus' place. After the events with "Amnesiac Optimus," Bumblebee tried to distance himself from everyone, not wanting to feel the pain of abandonment. It didn't matter how many times Optimus apologized to the youngling or the amount of soothing, encouraging phrases whispered into his audio units by the others, he didn't want any of it. Raf was the one to get him to open up enough to the others so they could help.

But now, Raf was pushing the scout away. The constant was rejecting the equation and changing the variables. The constant became irrational and threw the whole equation off balance. It no longer made sense, and Bee was trying to cope with it by changing himself.

As Arcee watched the retreating figure from her door, she felt angered and helpless. Her anger was directed at Raf, for making Bumblebee like this and not realizing the obvious signs of depression her friend showed. Yet, she knew it wasn't entirely the human's fault. Jack had gone through the same thing, pushing her away for some time. She stayed strong because of Bumblebee. She had accepted whatever help Bumblebee offered and they got through their tough times. But Bumblebee…she couldn't replicate his help if he didn't want it.

She never felt so helpless before. What could she really do to help? Maybe…she was the wrong teammate to talk to. Determination set in as Arcee walked out of her room, looking for the team's leader.

If anyone could get Bumblebee to talk, it was Optimus Prime.

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><p><strong><em>AN: I know this is a very short chapter, but what I had next didn't really flow well and it needed to happen in another chapter. Right now, the chapters for this story will be shorter than the usual 3,000-ish words I do for my other stories. Hopefully, it'll be just as good. Also, Bee's speech/thoughts are in bold because I can't tell if the slagging italics are working! :(_**


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